Days like Today.

Did you know that proportionate to their size, a babies scream is as loud as a jet engine?
Considering that all Rae has been doing this week, I'm probably going to go deaf soon.

Rae is 4 months old today.  I've heard having 2 gets easier once they reach 4 months old.  I'm praying that's true, because the past few months I've been in survival mode.  I like to think that I'm a patient person (I'm not), but recently I've felt like I'm losing my mind.


The past few weeks have been like this:

Wake up to screaming.
Nurse Rae.
Back to sleep until Big slams the door shut to leave for work.
Little S wakes up.
"RAE RAE! RAE RAE! MY BABY!"
Good morning kisses.
"Aw. TOOT!"
Change diapers.
Breakfast.
Make coffee.
Apparently Chex isn't appreciated by Little S.

Rae screaming.
Bounce Rae while bribing Little S to eat with fruit snacks.

Incomprehensible blabber.
Shower???
Change diapers.
Change clothes.
Do the dishes.
TV for Little S while I nurse Rae.
Wrestle the 2 tiny children, 2 diaper bags and a lunch box out to the car.
Go to the mall/playground/grocery store.
Rae needs to nurse at the most inconvenient time.
MELTDOWNS.
Back home.
Change diapers.
POOP.
POOP EVERYWHERE.
Feed Little S.
Nurse Rae.
Play cars.
NAPTIME.

Anddddddd it's over.
Change diapers.
Do the laundry.
Nurse Rae.
Play cars.
Chase Little S around the house like a crazy person.
Snacks for Little S.
Change diapers again.
Think about starting dinner.
MELTDOWNS.
Nurse Rae.
BIG S COMES HOME.
Make dinner.
Feed them dinner.
More incomprehensible toddler blabber.

Nurse Rae.
Bath for Little S.
Read books.
Bedtime prayers.
Bedtime.
Nurse Rae.
Bed for Rae.
Beg Big S for a foot massage.
Sleep.
Repeat.
Forever.

I've literally gone days without having adult conversations.  There are days when I have my running shoes laced up and I'm ready to bolt out the door the minute Big S gets home from work.  Or I have days where I've poured myself a glass of wine at 11 AM and just have it sitting on the counter waiting for Big S to get home so I can drink it.  There are days when Little S is an absolute monster and I feel like I have zero control.  And these are the days where I think I have absolutely no clue what I'm doing.

Then we have days like today.
Days where Little S snuggles up with me and watches Cars (for the 5836th time).
Where he has no tantrums.
Nights when he begs me to cuddle with him longer.
Where Rae nurses and then will lay on the floor for a few minutes without screaming.
Days where Little S helps me throw away diapers and cleans up his toys.
When Rae is all smiles.
Days when Little S says please and thank you without being asked.
When he holds Rae's hands and shares his cars with her.
Afternoons where I put him down for a nap, say "I love you" and he says "No, I ove most!"

It's these days where I think maybe I'm actually doing something right.  But no matter how the day ends, whether it be with tantrums or cuddles, I have nothing but love coursing through my veins (well, blood too).

M

Oh, PS: today is the last day to enter the Moose & Goose Co. giveaway!